I was married for ten years, have four beautiful boys under 9 and have a very fulfilling and successful career.My life is happy, but I really would love to share it with someone…but dating when you have FOUR kids is like the Mt Everest of the dating world!
Well, let me clarify: I have no shortage of “dates”. I have an outgoing personality and seem to be asked out a lot…
I guess I must be in reasonable shape because NOBODY can guess I’ve even had four kids, or that I’m even 34 (I get asked out by guys in their early 20s- I feel like I should read them a story and tuck them into bed… we usually go on a few dates, everything is going wonderful… I’m not talking about church bells, but just to an actual relationship. I am sick of being treated like a piece of ass, and treated like I must be desperate because I have kids.
I’m tired of guys treating me like I should be grateful if they even stick around for five minutes. Do I need to be a nun in order to find someone who can actually see a relationship with me?
Even if I really take my time getting to know someone before we become intimate… Don’t hear from him for days, I assume it’s over…then a text with, “hey are you home tonight? Is it unreasonable that I am hoping someone could take me seriously or see my worth?
I’ve been in a terrible relationship before and honestly now, I’d rather be alone than with the wrong guy.
I believe I have a lot to offer – I am caring, kind, warm, loyal and intelligent. I am not looking for a father for the boys; they have one.
I am not looking for a provider; I provide very well for myself.
I just want a friend and a companion and someone who I have chemistry and intellectual compatibility with.
I am seriously at the point of giving up on the whole dating thing…
Is it too much of an ask that I could actually meet someone who can see me as a woman, and not just as mother or worse, a bit of bedroom fun? I know Everest is high, but SOME people get up the damn thing, don’t they?
Dear Christina, Before I give you the pep talk you need, let me first acknowledge the painful truths that you’ve eloquently outlined above. Having four kids under the age of 9 is a huge handicap.