OK, so you have passed stage one of safely chatting across a website or email, possibly exchanged a photo or two and he or she has shown an interest in meeting you?
After many emails and a reliable reply from an understanding new ‘friend’ you may accidentally even sign off ‘love…’ one evening.
Maybe it was a Friday night and you had been out for a few drinks with friends, same old crowd, still not having met a new love interest, you came home felt like some company and yes, there was another email from that great person you just met on fusion101
As you have not met in person yet, you can’t be 100% sure this is going to work.
So be cautious of leading them on inappropriately by giving the impression that you have a serious interest in them that goes beyond a friendship.
As Christians we are more loving, more open and more inclined to be seeking a marriage partner. How much do you know about their past / past relationships? Probably the two most important decisions we make in life are our choice of career and the choice of partner we will marry.
This makes us more vulnerable and we need to protect each other from awakening love before the time is right (see the Songs of Solomon in the bible). It may be wiser to just keep it platonic on the email and start off slowly. Well, let’s compare how much time we put into both…
Don’t over compliment and gush with affection until you have spent enough time together in person to really be sure that this is the person you are happy to commit to for the rest of your life. we may spend from 1 to 3 or 7 years studying at college / university. How long do we spend getting to know a friend before we graduate them to boyfriend / girlfriend status. In the 1st five minutes people can often tell whether they feel at ease with someone.
Biblically it is said that ‘flattery is deception’. In fact a lot of interviewers decide in the 1st five minutes whether they plan to go to the second interview with a candidate. No attraction: That’s ok, there are always friends to be made regardless. Are they too keen and you can’t wait to go home and do the laundry? Well, if you really feel at risk, sense that they have ulterior motives, or just sense danger, keep it short and let them know you have to leave by a certain time and stick to the time.
We all want to be seen as attractive and desirable to our new partner, but attraction does not keep a relationship together forever. Be kind and friendly, they have probably sensed your lack of interest and are feeling disappointed. You have just set a time boundary, if they disrespect it, be firm, anyone who disrespects you does not deserve your time at all.