They then sit at home with your boyfriend, trading insults while they watch video footage of you on dates with each of the suitors; after which, you choose whether to stay with your boyfriend, or ditch him for one of your parents' selections.
After weeks of battering you right in your weakest spots, you are magically much less of a twat, so pick up somebody in a bar and go on a dinner date with them while the team spies on you from a van parked outside.
For months afterwards, you're convinced a van is following you.
Chance of getting laid: a 41-year-old virgin actually met his wife thanks to the show. Chances of eventually having to change your phone number because Jeremy keeps calling asking if he can crash on your sofa: 100%. Playing it straight Channel 4 2005 What you're missing: You are a woman who prides herself on her unerring gaydar, so you agree to live on a Mexican ranch with a dozen men, half of whom are hiding the fact that they are gay.
"Sleeping with the Boss"USA, Left/Right Productions"Im Dating a Superstar"NBC, A Smith and Co."Teen Wedding"Oxygen, Cineflix"Wonderkids"Lifetime, Ellen Rakieten Ent."Teen Trouble"Lifetime, Ellen Rakieten Ent."Altarcation"Lifetime, Ellen Rakieten Ent."Back in Wedding Shape"OWN, Denise Cramsey Prods."Estranged with Dr Drew"VH1.
Picture This TV"Family Reunion"TV Land, Warner Horizon Television"Hot 2 Not"TV Land, Allison Grodner Productions"I Married a Stranger"Fox, A Smith & Co"Girlfriend Wars"Oxygen, Incubator TV"There Is A Game Show In My Head"CBS, Katalyst/Fox21"Secret Agent: Housewives"CBS, Sojourn/Magic Moehill Prods."Liar"CBS, Reveilee, LLC"Wedding In A Week"Buena Vista, Lighthearted Entertainment"Judge By Jury"Paramount Pictures"The Dave Ramsey Project"CBS, Actual Reality Pictures"Grayhounded"CBS, Key Street Prod.
What you're missing: Imagine you're a witch and your coven is awaiting delivery of a sacrificial goat, only instead of a goat it's a cocky young man, and instead of ritualistic chanting there is lightly saucy badinage.You decide whether you fancy the man based on his skills - doing the funky worm, flexing his muscles, taking his shirt off - while he decides whether he fancies you based on your ability to keep upright on your skyscraper heels under the weight of hairspray and false eyelashes.If you're the chosen one, Paddy Mc Guinness will send you off on a date to the mythical isle of Fernando's, so you'd better be ready to put on a bikini and drink giant cocktails.If you're not chosen, you await the arrival of the next goat.What you're missing: MTV's Date My Mom - where you go on dates with a selection of moms in order to choose whose offspring to be paired up with, then when you have sex with them you can't stop picturing their mom - wasn't warped enough for your taste.Thankfully they then begat Parental Control: mother and father don't like your nogoodnik boyfriend, so they audition a parade of men and select two suitors they deem more eligible.