When I was a kid, my mom taught me two rules of grocery shopping.
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) The shopper who has chosen a swerving cart can have no peace.
Every maneuver, from turning down the cereal aisle to gliding alongside the meat section, becomes a battle-the shoppers will pitted against the carts.
Why am I talking to you about shopping carts when this book is about dating?
Well, I recall my bad luck with grocery carts because many times Ive experienced a similar battle of wills with dating.
Im not talking about conflicts between me and the girls Ive dated. And based on my experiences and my exploration of Gods Word, Ive concluded that for Christians dating is a swerver a set of values and attitudes that wants to go in a direction different from the one God has mapped out for us. Self-control isn't enough I once heard a youth minister speak on the topic of love and sex. rending story about Eric and Jenny, two strong Christians who had actively participated in his youth group years earlier. But as time went by, their physical relationship slowly began to accelerate, and they wound up sleeping together.
Eric and Jennys dating relationship had started out innocently? Soon afterward they broke up, discouraged and hurt. But both came to him separately and expressed emotional trauma and guilt over past memories. Some of us had made the same mistake or watched it happen in the lives of our friends. We wanted the pastor to tell us what we were supposed to do instead.
The pastor telling the story saw both of them years later at a high school reunion. When I see him, I remember it all so vividly, Jenny cried. When I see her, the hurt comes back, he told his former youth pastor. When the youth minister had finished telling this story, you could have heard a pin drop. But he gave no alternative that afternoon, Evidently the pastor thought the couple's only mistake was giving in to temptation.
He seemed to think that Eric and Jenny should have had more respect for each other and more self-control.
Although this pastor encouraged a different outcome saving sex for marriage he didnt offer a different practice. Head out on the same course as those who have fallen and hope that in the critical moment youll be able to stay in control?
Giving young people this kind of advice is like giving a person a cart that swerves and sending him into a store stocked with the worlds most expensive Chinaware.
Despite the narrow aisles and glass shelves laden with delicate dishes, this person is expected to navigate the rows with a cart known to go off course? Yet this is exactly what we try in many of our relationships.