This article originally appeared in my Stop Walking on Eggshells blog on Psychology Today.Have you ever wanted to ask a person with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder why he or she acts the way they do in romantic relationships?
It's funny that my non-borderline partners think I am attacking them because I feel the same way.
Most of my actions are done in self-defense to protect myself from some perceived threat.
Here are several behaviors I have displayed in romantic relationships and the reasoning behind them: Purposely broken a gift you gave me I did this because sometimes I get filled with rage that is hard to control.
You may have hurt my feelings, and when I'm upset I get destructive.
Weird as it sounds, destroying things you have given me hurts my feelings too.
I may have felt a strong sense of self-hatred and may have wanted to inflict some emotional pain on myself too.At times people with borderline personality disorder can become masochistic due to repetition compulsion, a desire to repeat previous experiences of emotional pain in hopes they can be resolved on a conscious level.Flirted with several other people at a time or having a crush on others while I'm still dating you I have a short attention span and people intrigue me.I'm not planning to hook-up with any of them, so what's the problem? When I meet someone new, I generally put them on a pedestal since I think so badly of myself.I don't know the new person well enough to be appalled by their flaws.Once I see who they really are, beyond superficial charm and first impression, the enchantment quickly fades away.